invest
i adhere to the notion of "you get back what you put into something". investing. truth is, i am terrible at math and thence terrible with money. which is ironical because in Hebrew the name Jessica means wealthy. odd. aaaaanyways, i've been thinking a lot about investing. not necessarily financially speaking, but more generally.
the Bible refers to this as reaping what you sow. call it what you like, i think it's important to invest. i personally believe in the investment of relationships. i love people. i think people need people (see the book title above i found at a thrift store). so if i like it when people call me regularly and invite me for dinner (which i DO), i can INVEST in others by sowing just those things! being a "WORK at home Mom" (heh heh heh) can feel isolating and can definitely be lonely from time to time. i have to prioritize time with friends and INVEST my time; myself into them. what does it reap, you ask? a good friend of course. it's funny to me who my kids love the most and feel the most comfortable around. it's the people they see and interact with on a weekly basis. nothing blesses my heart quite like a friend getting on the floor with my kids and investing a little bit of their time; themselves into my kids. seriously, i have to look away so i don't embarrass myself with tears.
the way i see it is like this. if you feel crappy and lonely and want some good friends, then start being what you want. i see this quote everywhere that says "Be the change you wish to see in the world" and i think Ghandi said it (awesome old man) - but the point is, i like it! if you want a good friend to take you out for pedicures, then BE that girlfriend for someone else! if you want to receive anonymous packages in the mail, then BE the one who does it for someone else! if you want a women's group in your hometown and you're all like "Ah, man.....that'd be awesome to have such a tight group of friends where we can talk about anything together...." then START ONE!
if you want something special you're gonna have to be a farmer. farming takes a butt load of work too. there's digging and getting dirty, there's planting, watering, waiting and more waiting. then there's even more waiting and more watering. you need lots of sunshine too. and sometimes you wield a bountiful harvest and sometimes you don't. that's usually where people give up. maybe you did farm for some good friends and your field came up crap and you got hurt. (trust me - it DOES happen to everyone). so do you just give up? it doesn't mean it's your fault and you should never try again. remember, we're going to reap what we sow. so if we sow nothing, we're going to reap nothing. an empty field will never produce fruit.
if your marriage is iffy, start investing into it. if your relationships with people at work are so-so. start investing into them. even if you're nothing alike - give of yourself and you'll be surprised what might come back. bake some cookies for a group of people - it doesn't have to be anything extravagant. when they talk, listen - REALLY listen. make mental files of what people love, when their Birthday's are, what their love languages are, favorite foods, restaurants, etc... be a secret Santa ALL YEAR LONG!
like i said earlier, i love people. i deeply cherish and value my friendships. i invest into them. i try and give my time, a listening ear, food, good gifts, tears and laughs when appropriate and advice if requested. i also have to be willing to give forgiveness and apologies. if i want to be forgiven and apologized to, then i should probably invest that as well into my relationships. you know? it seems simple, but it's so easy to have one bad harvest and choose to not invest in people anymore. yes, some people are gonna hurt you. we're human. but don't let one or two bad apples determine the rest of the orchard for you.
i recently re-watched a favorite movie of mine called 'About A Boy'. a schmarmy bachelor (Hugh Grant) believes that a man can be an island; that HE can be an island. until through a series of odd events a young, fatherless boy enters his life and overturns his paradigm. the movie is quirky and cute but i love how the bachelor discovers how much people need each other; how much he needs others. and his epiphany comes when he begins to invest in this boy. when he realizes that the boy needs him and he needs the boy. just the point i am making.
if you want a good friend - be a good friend. reap what you sow. get back what you put into something. those are my thoughts today. thank you and come back soon.
love, jessie
look who's standing!
good eater
